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How I Defeat My Neurotic Tendencies to Count
One small-scale example of my neurotic behaviors includes counting (this falls under the category of obsessive compulsive disorder), which creeps its way into my routine of walking the hallways of my living complex. I can tell you exactly how many steps it takes me to get from window to window, door to door, even how many stairs I climb to just enter my home. I used to dwell on this, feeling small and incompetent when I would try with all my might to ignore my fellow neighbors just so I could satisfy my count. It was getting to the point of feeling I must walk on the right side of the hallway, and not wanting to move if someone else was walking toward me. It was, for all intents and purposes, beginning to ruin my creativity and inhabit my mind. My poor, weak little mind. It forced me into this submissive thought that I was crazy. And fuck, maybe I am. But aren’t we all?
In the midst of this ongoing behavior, I listened to a podcast at work called The Minialists Podcast. One of the so-called minimalists, Ryan, mentioned a technique I now use for my counting — he used this to morph negative thoughts into creativity. Here’s how it might go for him (disclaimer: this is not the example he used, it is my example): say he stubs his toe on the corner of his bed frame. He is frustrated and possibly in pain and he starts to have negative thoughts. Instead of ignoring these…
